September, the month where kids start off every school-year by saying “finally, back to reality.” Ping provided by summers never-failing lag to kick off has us all on the edges of our seats each year, but there’s always still something undeniably satisfying about September being around the corner. The weekend just isn’t the weekend, without the dreadful 4 or 5 days before it (5 for most people, unless… THURSDEN).
For us over here at RLGT, September has usually meant time to kick it back into rhythm. No more work to distract us, or sun outside to attract us – back into the lab to fire out a couple thousand more Chance the Rapper posts. However, something this year has been a little bit different. Not the funk that we usually return to hark out our best Muddy Water’s blues impressions for, but rather something a little harder to explain.
Are we losing it or just getting old? Maybe neither.
Journal: F*ck A Routine (2 for 1)
When: A familiar late weeknight in September 2016
Where: Calgary, Alberta, in the aptly named ‘Spacement’ of my new house
What I’m Listening To: The Adam22 interview on No Jumper for the 4th or 5th time, pausing only to collect my thoughts to the tune of “Nights” by Frank Ocean.
(Frank Ocean – Nights… post the GOAT song of our generation. All rights to the artist)
I can’t really tell if this time around feels different than before or so similar that I’m just struggling to place it?
For the first time in five years (as I reluctantly age myself by placing 5th year senior status on my 21 year old baby face) the gang returns smaller than it left off. Not to mention I’m also living with a new set of room mates for the first time in two years. As many of these things have changed, the vibe still feels the same for whatever reason, if not just a little slower. The usual excitement of the first few weeks of school feel forced, and the things that we used to feel obliged to show enthusiasm for have seemingly seamlessly become chores. As I try to hang on to what is left of my college self I can’t help but be a little underwhelmed.
Much like many years before this one, I find myself back in between outlets. Simply an internet nerd looking for new sadboi songs to complement my Frank playlist before bed, and their counterparts to send to girls. Recently I’ve found interest in looking into the lives of various successful creatives through vlogs, interviews, etc, pinpointing their similarities in hopes of seeking out what is next. No Jumper is the current vice.
While watching the interview of the actual regular host, and OSS owner Adam Grandmaison (AKA Adam22), a couple of things made me sit up in my seat and honestly think “damn, this dude sounds exactly like me,” but one part in particular really stood out. He said:
It occurred to me, like, you could live your life day by day setting up a routine – ‘I wake up in the morning, I go to get coffee, I work on this for a little while, I go, and I fuckin’ workout, and I spend time with my wife, and I do all these different things’, and you can arrange your life like that – but if you are a person that has a fucking goal in mind, like something that you know that you need to accomplish before you’re gonna be happy with your place in life, FUCK A ROUTINE.
…at a certain point in my life I started thinking about my life like that. Unless I get this, this, and this and I’ve done these things that I feel like I need to do, I have no business in relaxing… all these other things that would hold me back from fighting to be the person that I want to be.
Just like that, it was like everything I needed to hear was put on a pedestal for me to absorb on some Osmosis Jones sh*t.
As great as it has been to find consistency with something that I love here at RLGT, with a team and a following (lol) that I actually give so much of a fuck about, pushing myself is something that will never ever be part of the routine. Minor successes are a mere falsehood blocking you from pushing yourself to your full potential, and comfort is nothing but the enemy at this point in my life.
As somber as this all may sound, best believe that RLGT isn’t dead, and we ain’t dying anytime soon (*’forever young’ plays*). Good leaders lead by example, and maybe it just took a few successes to let us realize that where we are should never be considered good enough.
My recent angst has been centered around getting old, but I can truly say that the only thing I can promise myself is waking up everyday with hopes of making each day better than the last – the only one method I know that will keep me young. 4 months left of my college career with no plans besides not wasting a day once I’m out (am I leaving prison or school? Unsure). I’ve got plans to go abroad for 6 months, and further plans to take on a new city after that. At this point, where I’ll end up is completely unknown, and doesn’t really matter. All that is guaranteed is that I will never stop creating, and in fact, I think it’s better that way.
Consistency sucks; Go teach yourself something new today.
Two words; one love,
When: A bunch of different days in September 2016
Where: Copenhagen, Denmark
What I’m listening to: Mac Miller – The Divine Feminine
(Mac Miller – God Is Fair, Sexy Nasty ft. Kendrick Lamar. All rights to the artist)
Rewind back one year.
I’m listening to GO:OD AM by Mac Miller at the University of Calgary campus. “Weekend” featuring Miguel comes on. I put it on repeat and start writing the most important article that I’ve written on redleafgoldteeth. “Only Losers Go To School” was a critic, an analysis, and a thank-you-letter of sorts; but most importantly, it was simply a commentary about inspiration and how I recently found it in my life.
Fast-forward one year.
Did I lose it?
It’s September 2016. I’m over 4000 miles away from where I was last year. I’m in a little studio apartment in the lively downtown community of Vesterbro in Copenhagen, Denmark. I’m listening to a familiar voice blare through my headphone speakers. It’s funny how something (or someone) as seemingly insignificant as Mac Miller can play such a momentous role of interconnectivity in something as intricate as the story of my own life. This time around “God Is Fair, Sexy Nasty” featuring Kendrick Lamar gets put on repeat.
I chose to study abroad for the final year of my degree and I unequivocally don’t regret a thing. Last week I was standing on a desolate cliff in the outskirts of Sweden staring into the Baltic Sea. Next week I’m going the UK to explore The Scottish Highlands (s/o Loch Ness Monster). Next month I’ll be seeing some of my favourite artists live in concert. The month after that I might be waking up in Italy somewhere.
These experiences that I’ll go through can’t really be captured or articulated through my keyboard; they’re situational, so I ask you to take my word for it.
And that brings me to my next point. As of the day of writing this, it’s been 32 days since the last new article was posted on the site. What happened? It seemed like we were rolling in the right direction just a couple months ago. It would be easy to pick any one thing off a long list of pre-rehearsed excuses. We got lazy, we got busy, other things started to take priority. They all have a certain amount of truth to them; however, the most insincere fiction I could write is that we lost inspiration.
Because much like my experiences abroad, inspiration itself is situational. And more than that, it’s complicated. Sometimes it becomes muddled in the routine of things. Sometimes you need to rediscover it over and over again through different instruments. Sometimes you need to move half way across the world to help it evolve.
We didn’t lose inspiration, we’re simply letting it grow.
I have ideas every single day. The vast majority will never come to fruition. Many of them I’ll never even voice to the people around me. But what this last year taught me is that ever so occasionally, one of those ideas will blossom.
If you’re truly inspired to create today, you’ll carry over that inspiration into tomorrow. If one of your ideas doesn’t work today, maybe the idea you have tomorrow will.
Continue to have ideas, continue to create, and continue to be inspired.
By no means is this the end.
We’ll be around.